Abuse dependency is when you feel lost without your abuser. When you have left your abuser, but you feel the need to return to him/her because you are not sure how they will manage without you or how you will manage without them. You may have experienced abused for so long that you are not sure how to function in a non-abusive environment.
Abusers are often needy people. They thrive on hurting people but cannot survive without needing help from those they hurt. Abuse dependent people are often in Love / Hate Relationships. The abuser says he / she loves you but hurts you. You hate the abuse but you feel the need to love and help your abuser. Why is that?
Very often people have described the need to love and / or help the abuser as the feeling you have when one or both of your parents fail to love you in ways that loving parents do. Some people still feel the need to love them simply because they are your parents, you have a biological bond, you have a longing to repair whatever is broken because it’s un-natural to not have a loving relationship with your parents, but what if your parents are abusive, toxic, and unable to offer a loving stable healthy relationship with you? Do you keep trying or do you come to the realization that this individual is a human being with flaws and issues that prevent them from being loving a loving parent?
Looking at the abuser as an individual who is flawed, toxic, incapable of loving or being loved or who is broken beyond repair is how you begin to move pass the feeling of trying to heal or “fix” that person and move toward the effort to heal yourself.
Follow Kaiyah’s Story. Kaiyah is a vibrant, intelligent, and beautiful 36-year-old female who is dating Navarro, a 50-year-old average looking, very narcissistic, highly successful businessperson with a limited education.
Kaiyah has documented years of abusive incidents in journals. Documenting and sharing Kaiyah’s journey in a blog will help to identify abuse in every phase of their tumultuous relationship.
The stories are not listed chronologically, but listed as they occurred or as a series of traumatic memories.
Kaiyah’s stories contain incidents of Verbal Abuse, Physical Abuse, Emotional, Psychological and Financial Abuse. Content may be graphic, strong language and sexual content that is not suitable for young children but may be beneficial for teenagers at the discretion of a parent or adult guardian.
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Abuse Dependency – copyright 2022
