MALE MOLESTATION
There is a Code of Silence among men. Expressing emotions, sharing feelings, crying, asking for help, and seeking counseling are all viewed as signs of weakness in the minds of most men.
Weakness, a condition of lacking strength, regarded as a disadvantage or fault.
Oddly enough, all humans have weaknesses, only men feel the need to hide them or pretend that they do not.
Molestation is sexual assault by one person upon another, yet people are more likely to associate this type of assault as more common among females from infancy to adulthood.
It would be highly uncommon and almost unheard of that boys from infancy to adulthood are molested if it were not for the new media reporting incidents of sexual misconduct committed by Catholic Priest. This revelation still associated this type of abuse to the confines of the Catholic Church but not in households, schools, athletic organizations or even the Boy Scouts of America.
Why is it so uncommon, so unheard of, so secret? The answer is because of the Code of Silence.
Statistically, 3% of American men-1 in 33 have experienced an attempted or completed rape in their lifetime. Over 100,000 men have been sexually assaulted in the military, an estimated 80,000 + male prison inmates are sexually assaulted each year. 60% of those assaults are perpetrated by jail inmates or prison staff.
A common trend among male rape victims is a loss of masculinity, the inability to fight off their attacker. The misconception is that females are unable to protect themselves because they are the weaker gender, but men are perceived as strong, soldiers, defenders and protectors of the weaker sex.
More and more celebrities are openly revealing their secret truth in the media, memoirs, interviews, and magazine articles. The release of Cannibal, by Marcus Munford is one of the most courageous signs of bravery that I’ve heard in years. Marcus pours his pain out in this revelation that he was molested as a child.
The song describes the abuser as an animal, the song’s title depicts the abuser as a Cannibal. Marcus never told anyone, even his mother wasn’t aware of the abuse until after hearing the song. During an interview Marcus said the abuse had the power to destroy him. He sings about forgiveness as if the abusive molester suffers from an illness. Yet is says that revealing his truth is freeing.
I applaud Marcus for using his musical platform to spread the message of molestation among men.
Not all men find revealing their abuse as freeing. A common thread among male rape victims is a loss of masculinity, coming to terms with their inability to fight off their attacker. The misconception is that only females are unable to protect themselves when in danger because they are perceived as the weaker sex.
Because of this code of silence, men are less likely to report sexual abuse even if it is inappropriate touching. Children are more fearful of telling their parents than anyone for fear of judgment, of being viewed differently or because of guilt or shame. An undetermined number of victims take their secret to their graves.
Long-term effects include mental health problems, alcoholism, drug abuse, post-traumatic stress disorder, depression, suicidal thoughts, suicidal attempts, underachievement at school or work and problem with intimacy and relationships.
My motto and best advice throughout my journey through tragedy, devastation and the everlasting effects of all types of abuse is:
Do not allow the abuser to abuse again. Predators will continue to prey until they are captured that is why SILENCE IS NOT AN OPTION. YOUR VOICE IS YOUR WEAPON AGAINST ABUSE.
EVERY 68 SECONDS AN AMERICAN IS SEXUALLY ASSAULTED
IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW HAS BEEN SEXUALLY ASSAUTED AND IN NEED OF IMMEDIATE ASSISTANCE CALL 911.
FOR HELP 24/7 CALL THE NATIONAL SEXUAL ASSAULT HOTLINE 1-800-656-4673
